The Worst Kind of News (7/10/13)

I got some horrific news from one of my best friends today. 

Fingers whiten on the phone.

They say that with bad news, your world comes crashing down around you.
And it does.

Glass shards streak across my face and slice my skin
Before you’ve even finished the sentence.
I know what you’re going to say.
The dark shadow at the back of my mind rears its head
And I see its face once
And once is too much.

You’re not worried. Well, you’re trying not to be.
You’re casual, airy. I know it’s wrong
Because your voice is low
And there’s a wobble in your tone
And you change the subject before I can ask

Are you going to be OK?

I don’t pray for much, only when I need to.
Your God is different than mine but I always thought He was the same
We write prayers with different addresses but they end up being delivered to the same house.
He’s being overloaded with mail right now.
For the first time in a month it’s not about me.
It’s about you.

You tell me not to worry but I can’t stop
If you’re not going to be scared, then I am.
Because the word cancer has arrived fashionably late into my life
Should’ve known he’d turn up sooner or later.
One in three, could’ve been me.
But it was you, and I hate me for it.

Programming (6/10/13)

I don’t even know if this is a poem or prose, but anyway. Something a little different.

<would you like to start a conversation?>

Yes.

<enter topic>

Oh God, I have no idea. OK, let’s try asking him how he is.

<error>
<sound card has encountered an unknown error>

Are you kidding me? Just open your mouth and say a damn ‘how are you’.

<error>
<target is unresponsive>
<retry?>

OK. Maybe he just didn’t hear me. Didn’t help that she started talking as soon as I did. I’ll just give it a second. Yeah.

<retry?>

In a minute!

<target is now available. would you like to try again?>

Yes.

<target responded: “I’m fine. How are you?” enter next command>

Respond!

<error>
<sound card has encountered an unknown error>

No. No. This is not happening now. Open your damn mouth.

<connection failure>
<target unresponsive>

Damn it, I missed my window. She’s got his attention again.

<retry?>

I don’t know.

<program failed. would you like to restart system and start again?>

No. Power off.

 

 

 

Untitled: A Musing (6/10/13)

A quick summary of my thoughts today.

The crinkles of your smile tell the best kind of story.
I want to trace your freckles with my fingertip and lose myself in the beauty of your eyes
Press my thumb to your lips before I catch them with mine
And lose myself in the sweetest way.

Sometimes I think about the way you smile
And I want to die.
Sometimes I think about the way you laugh.
I want to cry.

You reduce me to banality and insufferable giggling
And tears in my bedroom when my charade cracks.

I broke my heart into pieces already, just so it would be out of the way.
Better sooner than later, I always say.
Though I procrastinate the truth, and that way it shall stay.